Story: Replacing the what ifs…

I am fortunate to have always had friendships with women of all ages, ranging in age from several years younger to several years older than me.  Each one of those has taught me great things through various seasons, like being 15 and hanging out with girls who were in college, or being 13 and babysitting for a young mom and wife, or being 23 and living with someone who graciously shared her home with me while I was in transition of jobs, or being 38 and sitting on a back porch over a glass of wine and being encouraged by a friend a few years older.  I am also very blessed that they are people pray for me.  One of my greatest champions is my Mom, in both a role model and is in regular prayer for me. 

Yesterday I sat in a gathering of women from my church, ranging in all ages and stages of life.  The older women responding to questions and imparting wisdom of their lives into the younger. A priceless investment into lives of women who are willing to receive that wisdom and encouragement to persevere in days, weeks and seasons of life. 

I just sat and listened.

There are a few circumstances in my life right now that I find myself in a thought pattern of “what if”, logistical planning and trying to work out how all scenarios could play out.  They could be great changes, or leave me just as I am, or lead me into an unknown.  I know the end result of my “what ifs” is nothing but continual spinning in my mind.  But, even knowing that I still do it. 

I felt very clearly the Lord speaking to me to let those circumstances go.   

Let. them. go. 

I need to put my trust in the Lord, and let my faith carry me that He will work those things out.  Timing is out of my control. Decision making is out of my control.  End results are out of my control. But, I want control.  I want to put the pieces together.  I want to know what the writing of the next chapter will look like. 

Most days I read from Jesus Today as part of my morning reading/study time, and sometimes also read Jesus Calling, My Mom typically reads Jesus Calling daily. There are some days she will text me about it and I will read it that day as well.  Recently, (Sept 17th if you have Jesus Calling) the days words spoke so clearly to me.  attempting to control what will happen…peace illudes…unexpected pops up…figuring out is beyond my capability…commit it all to His care.  Just the reminder I needed.  Looking back those words were leading me to the point of letting these things go.  (see also 1st Peter 5:6-7, Proverbs 16:9 and Psalm 37:5)  

The only thing that matters in any of those circumstances is that I would trust He knows what is best for me and that my faith would increase, not my words, conversations, concern, worry, or planning.  So, I need to be silent on those things, I don’t need any one else’s opinion, I just need to sit back, and let the cards fall as they will. 

This doesn’t mean I don’t have hope.  I have immense hope. 

While at the same time those things are being called out of me to give up, some new things are being given to me to speak to.  Areas that I have been silent about for months, that I have prayed for right timing/right circumstance to arise have come to be.   These are the things I need to put my energy to.  They specifically use my gifts, they are at an appointed time and have been confirmed by people who didn’t even know they were doing so. 

So, while I am in a season of “waiting” for some things to come to be, there is a season of “right now” that needs to be my focus.  I am thankful for people who have specifically poured into me for such a time as this.  For encouragement both in letting some things go and running hard after other things. 

The things for each of us are different.  The race, the timing and the circumstances are unique to each of us.  If we were all on the same course, it would be so mundane.  Fortunately, there are those who have gone before us and those who are coming along beside us, and those coming up behind us — it takes all of these groups for us to run our race, for the pieces of the puzzle to fit together. 

So, whatever it is is that weighs you down, keeps you spinning with endless answers…maybe you’re being asked to surrender it.  Let it go and trust with great faith and great hope in how it will all turn out.  And, on the flip side, put your energy into the thing that you have been called to do, right now with great intention! 

I have seen it work out before, and I know it will again, the pieces of the puzzle come together without us even realizing it. 

via Magnolia Letter Arts

Ultimately in all circumstances, God will get the glory, not (wo)man.  For we were just waiting with hope to see how He works it out, focusing on what we were called to do, not spinning without purpose in a web of uncertainty. 


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